come June we will no longer have ate airene with us. i’m having separation anxiety–i get sad just thinking about it. i’m sure it’ll break Sadie’s heart. my tiny princess adores her nanny and i know she’s gonna miss her. but we can’t do anything about it anymore. i’ve negotiated with her husband, offered her a raise (which we were supposed to give anyway because she deserves it), get her SSS, and give her a 5-day paid vacation to see her family each month. ate airene said she wants to stay but she really must go because her children need her there when the school year commences. we are no way gonna stand against her decision to be there as her children attend school. i told her that if she decides to come back to us someday then we will gladly welcome her back.
she was with Sadie every step of the way, from the time she turned 7 months. she held her hands when she was just starting to take baby steps. read to her. slept with her in the afternoons when i’m busy with work. fed her and taught her how to use a spoon. she was a second mother to her.
i can’t imagine how it’s gonna be like without her in the house. sure, i can take care of my little boss–i did manage without a nanny for 3 months after Sadie was born. but what kills me is the thought of Sadie missing her. when she went back to the province for a while during her first month with us, Sadie got really sad. she didn’t eat for a day! so just imagine how it’s gonna be like when she leaves us for good.
finding a nanny is hard. getting a good one is trickier. i’ve even written about our travails here. at this point, we are already looking for a replacement but in my heart i’m still hoping ate airene could find a way to have someone supervise her kids while she stays with us. selfish, it is. but…
argh. i might just find myself crying when she leaves on the 27th. Sadie’s being extra thoughtful and sweet to her these days. could it be that she’s sensing her impending departure?
sigh. ate airene, you’re gonna break our hearts.